Monthly Archives: November 2011

Pardon the mess

Happy Turkey Day!!

I don’t think it’s changed me at all, I have the same values and convictions and, and positions and policies, um, just a greater appreciation I think for what other candidates go through, you know it’s pretty brutal, that the, the time consumption there and the, um, the energy that has to be spent in order to get out and about with the message on a national level, great appreciation for other candidates who’ve gone through this but also, uh, just a great appreciation for this great country.

There are so many Americans who are just desiring of their country to just get out of the way and let their businesses grow and progress, so great appreciation for those who share that value, and it was a blast, every day was just a blast out there on the trail.

Reporter: Any other future plans for office?

Um, ya know, plans just include, uh, gittin’ through, uh, the budget process that we’re going through right now, building the state’s budget based on, uh, the price of oil that has plummeted so greatly and reining in the growth of government and, uh, uh plans LIKE THAT having to do with uh, helping to govern this state and building this team that, uh, is continually being built to provide good service to Alaskans, so in my role as governor, that, that’s what my plans are all around.

Reporter: Speaking of declining oil prices are you concerned about any state programs on the chopping block?

You know thankfully we’re in a good position still, fiscally speaking we’re in a good position, but, it, made no sense that a hundred and forty dollars a barrel oil, that, that some lawmakers wanted to spend spend spend, we were warning them then the administration was that we had to prepare for the day that the price of oil would plummet which of course it has done.

So we have prepared then, reined in the growth of government then, and we will, um now, uh, uh that comes into play at this point, where the savings we had set aside, forward funding, anticipating the drop in oil, uh, accounting for that, all that comes into play now, at fifty dollars a barrel.

Reporter: Great! So why was today so important to you for…?

Aaaoohhhwww…well this was, this was neat. I was, uh, happy to get to be invited to participate in this and, and uh, you know, it’s, it’s for one, you need a little bit of levity in this job, especially with uh, so much that has gone on the last couple of months that has been so, um, political obviously, that it’s nice to get out and , and do something to promote a local business and, and to uh, just participate in something that isn’t so heavy-handed politics that it invites criticism….Certainly we’ll probably invite criticism for even doing this too but at least this is fun.

Reporter: And what is it that you’re thankful for this year?

Blah blah thankful blah family blah

Track blah Iraq blah blah

Trig blah blah thankfulness blah blah Alaska blah Alaska blah blah…

blah blah food

tradition blah blah Alaska

blah blah friends family Alaska blah

Reporter: What are you gonna cook for Thanksgiving?

I-I-I’ll be in charge of the turkey…

 






The best Venn

This diagram could replace half the words in my “About” section.

Overturned rocks

As this blog reaches a wider audience, it is inevitable that the riff-raff start climbing out from under their rocks. Alas for them, we only have one purpose for trolls. Poking, of course! This grubby little denizen of DickwadLand is quite appalled and offended at PlasticLand.  Poor thing. I’d hate to think what might happen if he watched Robot Chicken or had a look at Mariel Clayton’s work. Very fragile, these troll psyches. He goes by the misnomer of “recovering liberal,” but I suspect that’s just his gimmick. Anyhoo, here he is. A troll is a troll. Our little community has no room for these humorless souls. Oh, and don’t forget to notice that he credits PDS to jealousy, which shows his lack of creativity and his lack of reality-based thinking.

You have won the award, hands down, as the most mad, bizarre psychotic site on the whole internet. The roots of PDS were explicable, I thought based on jealousy and frustration but you have taken it to a lower level worthy of Dante.

Jesus tap-dancing Christ. This is some of the sickest stuff I have seen in some time.This blogger lives in bizzaro-land.

Real trolls aren’t nearly as cute as our PlasticLand trolls, but PerilsCat will ride herd on them nonetheless.

Kickin’ back in Oregon

It was a chilly, but relaxing, week off in Oregon.

Thanksgiving is coming

I am still taking a break in Oregon, but I have my mind on the upcoming holiday. I’ve been waiting for months to do the great turkey pardoning. Finally, it is time. I will be hard at work the next couple of weeks re-creating Sarah’s most excellent comedy moment. What’s not to love? Stay tuned.

Look! I brought you another troll toy to play with!

It would be more fun if I got more than one of these every month or two, but here is the little guy for you to poke. Like most trolls, he lacks punctuation and humor. Poor little thing. Anyway, this is Doug. He sounds angry. These trolls are a grumpy lot.

whomever wrote this has got to be one dumb sonofabitch even for abumbass democrat kiss my ass

We Are Anonymous

The date is November 5th.  Ensconced in their Fortress of Anonymity, the legions of Anonymous are hard at work, delving deeper and deeper into the inner workings of Fox News Online.

Tap tap tappity tap tap…clickity click click.

Clickity click click…tap tap tap.

“Hey dude, check this out.”

“Whatcha got?”

“Look at this. It is the feed to Sarah Palin’s Fox studio in Alaska. All the lights, teleprompter, the connection to the main Fox studio. All connected together with an Internet switch to turn it on and off.”

“Wow. Do you think they set it up as a kill switch in case they just couldn’t take that screech anymore?”

“I don’t know, but it’s live right now.  That crazy bitch must be squawking to one of the Fox pinheads.”

“Well dang! Turn it off.”

“Okay, this should be fun.”

WE ARE ANONYMOUS

WE ARE LEGION