Woman of the Year

Sarah: This award that you are sayin’ they are giving me, the woman one, you are sayin’ they are giving it to me for not running for President?

Voice on phone: Yes for staying home with your family.

Sarah: My flippin’ family? They bought that crap about stayin’ home with these ungrateful snots who want all my money? Giving me an award for not running for a flippin’ crappy job that I’m too good for and didn’t want and wasn’t planning to go for anyway because Obama Hussein probably trashed the White House anyway, knowin’ that cow of a wife of his, there, pretendin’ she can run so I’m gettin’ an award for quittin’ after pretendin’ to want the job so that those GOP dolts, there in the beltway, those wimpy ones, bein’ jealous of me and Obama, would be vetting themselves and learnin’ how to have a still spine?

Voice on phone: Yup.

Sarah: God I’m good. I need to not run for president next time too.

Sarah: I think I’ll wear my leopard jacket for the award. PIPER!! Stop scrubbing the studio bathroom and pack my spare wigs! And my leopard coat! And my Spanx! Those whiny GOPers at CPAC will be so jealous.

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15 responses to “Woman of the Year

  1. Cracklin' Charlie

    Don’t forget your two big shoes, Sarah!

  2. Git over here Piper and Willow, couldja act happy this time, I want a nuther award. Kids what a pain in the a**, all yer good for are a few picshurs to make me look good. Come on smile or I’ll take yer new car away Willow. I mean it! Sit up, look happy or I won’t bail you out of jail next time.

  3. You made her look too healthy with that version of the grifter loser. But very funny nonetheless. πŸ™‚

    • Short of zombification, I have difficulty taking the healthy perky glow out of barbies. It’s in their DNA. I’ve tried doing some fine line wrinkles, but it tends to just make the face look dirty, and really, Sarah has had so much botox and such that she is pretty close to a barbie. It’s that damn cheery expression on the barbies I’d like to eliminate. If only I could give them mean girl looks. But unless I go with Robot Chicken style animation, I’m stuck with the perky.

  4. You are incredibly funny and very talented. Everytime I come here I laugh & laugh! The troll post is very insightful! It’s too bad some people call anyone who disagrees with them a troll. And the namecalling!! The comments at IM have gone downhill due to 2 or 3 people. There used to be more intelligent and truly funny comments, but the troll/s and namecaller/s have turned off a lot of readers.
    So keep it light and funny here!!

  5. LOVE the troll/gatekeeper post (esp bc after I commented anonymously on a recent thread, I was accused of being “Baldy” herself!)! And this one is pretty awesome too. πŸ™‚

  6. Close the comments on the troll post? Oh, you think you are so smart. But you’re not. We trolls can comment all over your blog. And besides that, we trolls are not brown. We’re more of a Boehner orange — if you get the best of us do we not cry orange tears? You’ll get yours, you hater of anything Wasilla. We big-hair Bumpit bimbos are not to be messed around with; our Queen shall reign!

  7. I think I have found a way through your closed comments. Loved the trolls.

  8. Yes, I have. πŸ™‚

  9. This version of LaPalin looks 1000x better than the real one will look on Saturday nite. Bwaahahahah

  10. You are the best source of Palin comedy on the Internet. Love this place. Made a great point in the Troll post, and I saw lots of comments about it at IM, probably left by people hoping some trolls will take the hint. I’m trying to keep the discourse at The Palin Place Blog civil, and so far the comments I’m getting there are really productive , thinking comments. Trolls aren’t funny. YOU are funny.When people want a laugh, they need to come by here. When they want to discuss ideas about Babygate, they should come over the PP. I interviewed Shailey for today’s post. Have you any plans to introduce a Shailey doll giving Sarah a massage?

    • Thanks Allison. As for Shailey, or anything to do with babygate, there is too much undercurrent of tragedy and nastiness there. When I look at it, I get NO funny vibe at all. I only follow the funny vibe and stay on the light side. That’s for me, because I have to enjoy what I’m doing to keep doing it.

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